Decision-Making and Boundaries with the Tenth Age

It's Decision Time!

Tenth Age classes had Character lessons about decision-making and boundaries.  The decision-making lesson focused on the fact that many decisions are simple (having milk for lunch), but others are difficult (studying for a quiz or playing with a new computer game).  The difficult ones were the ones we focused on, and we talked about specific steps to take to make a decision.
,
Here is an example:
You have been invited to a birthday party and accepted the invitation.  A few hours later, you get asked to a Ravens game.  You have never been to one of their games and are a huge fan of the team.   What are you going to do? Think about your options and the consequences.  Ask yourself, "How will this decision affect me and how will it affect others?"

The decision-making model we used is:

1. Look at the decision to be made
2. Consider all the options or choices
3. Think of the consequences
4. Consider how the decision will affect others
5. Pick the best solution from all the options 
6. Evaluate your decision. 

I emphasized that it is important to make decisions that are in keeping with the four Calvert Pillars, and in line with being a positive student, friend, and family member. In addition, I asked them to think of several adults they could talk with about a tough decision.  Participation was excellent, and we will do a follow-up lesson in January!

The boundaries lesson focused on the importance of both physical boundaries as well as verbal, social, behavioral, and emotional boundaries.  I used tape to "draw the line" down the middle of 10-A and 10-B to show how boundaries can be permanent or temporary depending on the situation.  Good boundaries help us to stay safe and define ourselves; they also help us  respect others and their needs and rights.  Studies show that children who have difficulties recognizing and respecting others' boundaries may:

• Not accept "No" for an answer
• Encroach on others' physical or emotional space
• Exhibit out of control emotions or behaviors
• Have difficulty maintaining friendships
• Have difficulty accepting limits set by parents and teachers
• Lack awareness of socially acceptable interpersonal behavior
• Insist that others agree with them

When both schools and homes are consistent with boundaries for their children, they will see healthy interactions, strong self-esteem, steady self-regulation, and respect for rules and appropriate behavior.

"Drawing the Line" with 10-A

  

Seventh Age Students Practice the Art of an Apology

Whispering can create a Conflict

 

They Apologize

Hadley and Katie Practice Writing an Apology Note

Learning to apologize in a thoughtful and effective way takes practice, and Seventh Age girls had a good time trying to perfect it!  With the help of Kelso's Choice curriculum, we talked about the art of an apology.  Sometimes it makes sense to wait a day to apologize so that there is a chance to "cool off" after the conflict.  Other times, one needs to apologize right after the incident. 

An apology is in two parts.
1. SAY something: Tell them what you are sorry for.
2. DO something: Take action or stop an action to fix the problem (promise not to spread rumors, clean up the spill). 

An apology can be spoken or written and we practiced both.  Tone of voice is extremely important in a sincere verbal apology as are the use of "I-Messages."

Girls Share their "I'm Sorry" Notes

 

Each girl was given an "I'm Sorry" note card and wrote to "a friend." They had a chance to read their cards aloud, and this exercise gave them lots of ideas for creative apology writing!  I hope they will continue to practice this skill during the year as it is a valued one.



Tackling Worry

Aiden Shares his Strategies for Tackling Worries!

Having worries is a common experience for elementary school children.  A little is normal, but too much can be debilitating.  I worked with 8-1, and we read the books David and the Worry Beast and Don't Feed the Worry Bug.  Both of these books are fun to read because they involve bugs and beasts that blow up like balloons when the children worry excessively!  They make a serious topic very accessible to students.   As they listen to the books they gain a quick grasp on how worry can take over, and how important it is to try to keep worries in perspective and talk about them to adults. They learn they are not alone and that everyone worries at times.  Common worries for 8-1 were tests, quizzes, athletic games, and the health of their families.   We talked about using music, deep breathing, and even talking back to the worries.  Each boy drew a picture of what their "worry bug" looks like and then told the class how they talk to it so that it "deflates."  Good ideas were shared by all!


Here are some tips for parents:

1. Acknowledge your child's fear or worry, no matter how small, and help him/her keep it in perspective.
2. Verbalize confidence in your child and offer support but don't support his avoidant behavior.  Avoiding the cause of anxiety only magnifies it for the child.
3. Make sure your child's anxiety is not the direct result of an adult placing too much pressure on him/her to achieve beyond realistic levels.
4. Acknowledge your child's efforts to combat the worry and to take risks to overcome it.
5. Seek professional advice if the anxiety persists over time and interferes with day-to-day living.

 

8-1 Shares their Worry Bugs  and Beasts!